Our Words About Ourselves, In Our Homes, And Making A Positive Change
Our Words About Our Self
Our words are so powerful. What we say about our self, affects how we see ourselves. Words impact how we live out life which directly affects those we love and are the closest to us, which probably points to those within our household. So, figuring this out seems of top priority.
Let’s begin our discussion with addressing what we say sometimes say about ourselves. Do you even realize how you talk about yourself? How many negative words come out of your mouth about yourself? I just want to throw out a few things I have said about myself or heard other women speak about themselves:
I am so stupid.
I hate ….
That makes me so mad.
I can’t help it.
That is just the way that I am.
I have been that way all my life.
I can’t do anything about it.
There are so many more statements we make tainted with negativity, hopelessness, and lies. But for today, let’s address the statements above and lay them next to the truth of God’s Word.
I Am So Stupid.
First of all, we are not stupid. I addressed that lie in last week’s blog post, Women Buying Into The Lie, “I’m Not Smart Enough” Began With Eve.
I Hate ….
That Makes Me So Mad.
When it comes to hate, the only thing we need to hate is sin. Talking about what we “hate” all the time just keeps us focused on the wrong things. The same thing goes for the statement, “That makes me so mad.” When we make those statements, what are we focused on?
Philippians 4:8 says,
Finally, brethren, whatever things are true, whatever things are noble,
whatever things are just, whatever things are pure, whatever things are lovely,
whatever things are of good report, if there is any virtue and if there is anything praiseworthy--meditate on these things.
When words of hate or anger come out of our mouth, we need to stop and evaluate what has our attention and shift it back to what is good.
I Can’t Help It.
That Is Just The Way That I Am.
I Have Been That Way All My Life.
I Can’t Do Anything About It.
These 4 statements have all come out of my mouth way too many times. When we say things like this, we are disagreeing with God.
Galatians 5:22-23 says,
But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control. Against such there is no law.
Galatians 5:22-23
Self-control is a fruit of the Spirit. So, by the power of the Holy Spirit of God living in us, we can help it.
2 Corinthians 3:18 says,
But we all, with unveiled face, beholding as in a mirror the glory of the Lord, are being transformed into the same image from glory to glory, just as by the Spirit of the Lord.
2 Corinthians 3:18
God’s work in our life is transformation. We should continually see God’s transforming work in our life making us more different today than who we were yesterday.
Our Words In Our Homes
According to Proverbs 14:1:
The wise woman builds her house, but the foolish pulls it down with her hands.
Proverbs 14:1
And Proverbs 31 is the chapter that highlights the esteemed and blessed woman of God and how she handles herself in her household. Proverbs 31:26 directly addressed how she talks.
She opens her mouth with wisdom, And on her tongue is the law of kindness.
Proverbs 31:26
With the idea of women, wisdom, and words there were 5 verses in Proverbs that stood out to me and show us the opposite of the wise woman.
A foolish woman is clamourous; she is simple, and knows nothing.
Proverbs 9:13
Better to dwell in a corner of a housetop,
than in a house shared with a contentious woman.
Proverbs 21:9
Better to dwell in the wilderness, than with a contentious and angry woman.
Proverbs 21:19
It is better to dwell in a corner of a housetop,
than in a house shared with a contentious woman.
Proverbs 25:24
A continual dripping on a very rainy day and a contentious woman are alike.
Proverbs 27:15
These 5 verses highlight the foolish woman and the terms used to describe her are clamourous, contentious, and angry. Overall they speak of how she lives within her own home.
Here is what the original Hebrew term for clamourous means:
Ø to murmur, growl, roar, cry aloud, mourn, rage, sound, make noise, tumult, be clamorous, be disquieted, be loud, be moved, be troubled, be in an uproar
Contentious is not a word we use in our everyday language, but the original Hebrew term for contentious means strife, contention, or argumentative and angry means exactly what you think, anger. I believe all three, clamourous, contentious, and angry are displayed in the words that we speak.
The childhood saying, “Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me” is a lie. Words hurt and they have the protentional to penetrate much deeper than our outer physical bodies. Words spoken in strife, conflict, and anger potentially can tear down our very own household.
How To Change What We Say:
1) Acknowledge we have a problem with speaking the wrong words.
If we are going to evaluate our words and their effect in our homes, we first need to be conscious of what we are saying. I want to encourage you to be aware of your words and even question your words.
For we all stumble in many things. If any one does not stumble in word,
he is a perfect man, able also to bridle the whole body.
James 3:2
Not a single one of us speaks the right words all the time. We all mess up. While we will not reach perfection on this side of heaven, we should be growing and transforming everyday.
2) Journal your words that need changing.
Writing down what you say that you know aren’t your best words, or even out right wrong words, sets you up to identify and understand your words. It gives you a way of getting to the root cause of your words and allows you a way to address lies and replace them with truth.
3) Lay your words next to God’s word and let truth rule and reign.
Once you have identified and written down your words that need changing, ask God to reveal truth to you. Then open your Bible. Use your Bible index to search out words that connect to your statement or the emotion your feel behind your words. Search until you find, the truth that you need to transform your words to good words, or even better, God’s words.
Finally dear sister, I leave you with this. Change and transformation take time and sometimes you need to give yourself some grace. Giving yourself grace isn’t a pass to stay the same. It’s showing yourself kindness as you walk through the process of change.
